Athema

My dears, my dreams are haunted, and so Is everything else. I am so scared. No one to turn to, nothing to trust. What will become of me, oh what will happen to me? I am ever so lost.

After a long period of getting fucked over, I decided to come back to this. I am so deeply aggravated though. My bones ache from long days, and my head spins. Will someone help?

You can all go fuck your self up the ass. I am really pissed at you all.

These people piss me off. Accusing me of not being real, being a stalker. You know, I fucking showed up at auto-nu last night. 1:30. Nobody was fucking there. Asshole, really. So, I am pissed, oh, And Kristine, thanks for being a bitch.

I have a new poem, if you would like to read it ( Collapse )

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. Do you have a crush on me?
5. Would you kiss me?
6. Describe me in one word.
7. What was your first impression?
8. Do you still think that way about me now?
9. What reminds you of me?
10. If you could give me anything what would it be?
11. How well do you know me?
12. When's the last time you saw me?
13. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
14. Have you ever talked about me behind my back?
15. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?

_____________________

Please do this, everybody, and anybody that reads my journal. If anyone does.

I cant help but wonder, who are these people I constantly surround myself with. Is it possible to feel so alone, with so many people? I dont know what to think anymore. I am losing myself in this fog of unknowingly extinct thoughts. I look through the eye of my enemy in hope to gain confidence to fight. But nothing is there. I miss everyone so, everyone I once knew. With my life so far away. I am losing everyone. God have mercy on the world, please, because I cant.

So people think that I indeed stalk them. Of course not. Many people around here simply do not know me. I have a solution to that reason. I am homeschooled, of course, and I dont really know anyone. Of course Athema is not my real name. I admit to using it as an aleius. But you can never be so sure. I might as well just be a follower, or simply one of you, just using a different name. All I say is that I probably know you, and you just dont know it. I do not stalk people. I barely ever go out. With that said I leave now.

My felling towards lately... nothing. I have been trapped, nothing to do, noone to talk to. And the thing my heart wants the most, it cant have. The one thing I truely want, I am being taken away from. I dont understand this cruel world. It never ceases to amaze me. The words that these people speak, could kill. And soon will. I am being torn, and it hurts, really, it does. Well, soon I will go.

Just a little something I stole from lucifersclown. ( Collapse )